Congratulation, and all good advice, remember to make time for each other too. Bring her camping as soon as you can Our youngest was at her first festival at 3 months. A little thing I did when the kids were born was to buy all the newspapers on the day to keep as a sort of time capsule of the world they were born into. The oldest is 12 now so maybe its time to start dragging them out.
We have eleven between us ,it doesn’t matter if you forget their name or call them something else Start looking for a car now for their 18th something you can drive (just to keep it going).. Keep the van to escape from them
Start the way you mean to go on. Children have (mostly) developed their behaviour patterns by the age of three... and so have the parents', its very hard to change the relationship after that. Eating and screaming are young childrens' biggest weapon. Don't let them be fussy eaters, they won't starve, and don't give in just because they scream. They will soon learn and everyone will have a happier childhood. Also, don't contradict the other parent, so if Mummy says no to more cake, don't give in when she appeals to you with those big eyes. Read her bed time stories as often as you can, and spend as much time with them as possible. Let them know you love them, what ever they do, even if you don't approve. Enjoy them, my two have left home and live in another country now, how did that happen? There was a public health advertising campaign over here a few years back, "a dirty child is a healthy child", with a picture of a baby sitting in some mud. Don't put them in a sterile bubble, even more important now than ever that they develop a strong immune system. Camping is perfect for this.
Probably a bit controversial, but DON'T get their name tattooed on you. Your children are great, but they don't define you. Talk to them loads. If you or your wife want to be a stay at home parent, do it. Don't worry about the money, you'll survive, and your kids will get everything they need from their parents, not an employee. Put your phone down, and don't give them a phone to keep them 'entertained'. I've also got a good tip for making formula milk if it's what you both choose. PM me if you're interested. It's a lifesaver for those 3am feeds.
Sensible advice,.. don't pander to them... And don't become a paranoid parent ... they will fall over and get into A&E...
If your wife ends up having a C section, don't look round the screen or at the reflections in the lights. The internet is an evil web of child rearing nonsense - most 'experts' know little more than you will. Don't get drawn into 'gentle parenting' and 'sleep training' and all that nonsense. There is no silver bullet, but the sleepless nights don't last that long (although they fell like they do at the time!). Keep the local out of hours doctors number to hand, kids get most sick at night and at weekends, and often recover miraculously once you finally get to see a doctor/A&E nurse etc. Enjoy them when they are small, they really do grow quickly.
Try and avoid all but the first mid-wife appointments after the birth. What they don't tell you is all their advice is just opinion. If like round here you get someone different every week, they'll contradict each other. We (I) told ours to bog off after a couple of weeks.
To reiterate from above, make sure you and your Mrs present a united front. Read with them and explore books every night. Make TV an occasional treat. Stay off video games. It means they occupy more of your time at first, but mine are now eight and six and they can often be found sitting reading - they love books and are able to concentrate well at school. Put them to bed in their own room as early as is reasonable. Try not to go in there every time they cry. Have a bath, read a book, then sing a song to them in bed. Turn the light out and let them get used to getting to sleep on their own. You will need those few hours every evening of adult time. Get a baby pouch so you can get out and about and walk around with them close to your chest. I really miss that! Buy a vw camper van to take them on holiday in...
Ah - you'll now need a towbar fitted to drive her and her pony to gymkhanas........have you seen the price of Ifor Williams horse boxes ??!!
Funny you say that, I bought a tow bar the other day, it's for the bus, so I doubt that will be pulling any horses Sent from my Pixel 3 XL using Tapatalk
Have tea with them every night, round a table, while they’re at home. teach them to cook it occasionally
We told ours to do one to... she was a community nurse or something and was totally unprepared, didn’t know ours was prem, never dealt with a prem, didn’t want to pick him up he was so small... and was very scared of our dog. Didn’t see her again!
Well this came round fast. Little one is now over a month old. And I'm still getting used to the crying Sent from my Pixel 5 using Tapatalk
congrarulations!!! It’s a massive change in your life - there will Be highs and lows. Try and get some sleep as that is so important for you both and remember everything is ‘just a phase’! Not sleeping, not feeding well, crying loads - all Just a phase. When you think whoa this is hard - you get the first smile and it’s all magical, wait til they get mobile - crawling, toddling about - it’s hilarious.
Enjoy the time before the birth - go out (when we can again), eat out etc...all that ends abruptly. If you get a chance to sneak some gas and air at the hospital...its a good high. Share feeds if you can - ours were breast fed but we did a bottle at bed time; Mrs Alpha would get her head down at 8 or 9 ish, I did the late night feed at 10 or 11 then when they woke at 2/3 am for the next it wasnt quite so horrendous for her. Second hand is the way forward for lots of things - ours are now 6 and 3, and a lot of xmas presents were decent, boxed, second hand toys (saves a few polar bears hopefully too in recycled plastic "tat") Encourage learning - my son and I used to look at the stars at night before bed, at 6 (after discovering how youtube works) he can now name all the planets, in order, and regularly baffles me with random info he's picked up. Make time for each other - your not defined as "parents" - you're a couple first and foremost. Try and get involved in some groups etc for local support - but dont worry if you dont "gel" with some - a lot of the NCT groups turn out to be a bit "middle-class" one-upmanship affairs we found; everyone competing for who's child has reached whichever milestone first...you may however find some good friends and support there Don't buy into the "Bounty" stuff they offer in hospital - they'll come round taking photos of lil'un then try and flog you stuff at stupid prices. Establish routine early and stick to it - rigid bed times, meal times etc help for a content baby. We thought our friend was being a little "anal" by doing lunch at 12 on the dot... but then we found out why! Congratulations - it'll feel like a mountain to climb but you soon get in the swing
