Lennon singing drunkly to Yoko his new song "and so this is Christmas, and what have you done" immediately interrupted by her " I done the shopping, cooked the meal, written the cards......"
Reminds me of the girl who, when asked what she wanted to be when she finished school said "I want to be a table in a restaurant." When asked why, she replied "cos I'll get laid three times a day.".
Is it ok to put a turkey in the fridge? I put ours in yesterday, but every time I open the door, it tries to get out.
How to tell the sex of an ant. Drop the ant in water. If it sinks it’s a girl ant, if it floats it’s….
I often wonder why the number 11 is called eleven. I mean every other double digit number follows a very strict pattern, ie Two nines is ninety nine Two eights is eighty eight Two sevens is seventy seven Etc So why isn't Two ones onety one?
I was inquisitive so looked this up… The special position occupied by 10 stems from the number of human fingers, of course, and it is still evident in modern usage not only in the logical structure of the decimal number system but in the English names for the numbers. Thus, eleven comes from Old English endleofan, literally meaning “[ten and] one left [over],” and twelve from twelf, meaning “two left”; the endings -teen and -ty both refer to ten, and hundred comes originally from a pre-Greek term meaning “ten times [ten].”
I'm expecting a call from the Nobel prize committee fairly soon relating to my discovery of a new number. 'Ump', I suspect it was lost during decimalisation, or maybe the move to the Gregorian calendar. Following similar logic to the above, we have umpteen, which must be ten plus ump. So it follows there must be 'ump', umptyump, etc. QED
A colleague of mine taught Maths - he managed to convince his class that they should learn their "Umpteenth times table" and had them reciting it - they eventually twigged that it was April 1st.
