Builders flat roof question

If you're using derby runners with 6" stebbings, don't forget to badger them off with a dead Frenchman. I normally fettle the ends with an arsing hammer, just to make sure.

 

By the way @jivedubbin the cost for that information will be 100 Guineas

 

10 pence in new money

 

Why not go for something adventurous?

 

Oh the old dead Frenchmen, I remember doing a roof in Chiswick when a Frenchman fell from a settle, it almost ripped the cave caps off

 

Chinese barge boards? Don't get me going...

 

I thought they were banned after the 1974 Barnsley Town Hall disaster

 

Are we helping Jivester

 

Oi! You promised not to mention that

 

Did they ever find out who's shoddy work that was?

 

The sun warped the Chinese barge boards they fell and wiped out the entire field of the whippet derby

 

It was the Arkwright brothers from Sheffield

 

I’ve got a question @snotty what the f
Is an Arsing hammer

 

It's used for shagging rough ends over.

 

I noticed @crossy2112 was very quiet after the whole lot came down. Wouldn't tell anyone who his carpenter was.

 

Ok, but @Fog on the tyne paid me to not say anything

 

He’s not related to the Arkwrights is he, the old man Arkwright held the Yorkshire record for the eating the most amount of lard sandwiches in a minute, 27

 

He only beat me by 1

 

I don’t know the first thing about flat roofs, but I can give you a very solid bit of advice.

Never ever drink in a pub with a flat roof. Think about it, have you ever been in one that wasn’t rough as aresholes?

 

PTFE tape wrapped around his fingers again