Things not to say to the wife

Will the best man be polishing balls ?

 

No, but this lot are talking it.

 

Put me down for the stag do

 

But we're not tampering with them.

 

Ouch!

 

Only 15 years ago?
You don’t want to rush into anything....

 

It took me nearly 13 years to ask the first time. I think,it can be safely said that it's going to be a cautious engagement ( if it ever happens ).

 

Look up how De Beers talked up industrial abrasives available by the tonne as a desirable item by limiting supply and telling people that it was a quality thing to give a diamond as an engagement ring.

 

They are strange beasts though.

My missus said to me the other day "you're were't even listening to were you"

I was thinking what a strange way to start a conversation.

 

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From personal experience I can say, think before you speak and consider the consequences.

With the first Mrs T, it was my flippant reply to her comment whilst in the shed restoring a Honda CD 175....
1st Mrs T - "You think more of that bike than you do of me"
Me - "at least I can ride it when I want to"

Bad response soon followed by divorce

With the 2nd Mrs T (after I found out she was sleeping around) it was my reply to an argument....
2nd Mrs T - "where do you expect me to go at this time of night"
Me - "I don't care where you go but if you don't leave now I will through you through the bedroom window, clothes on or not"

She soon left and divorce followed

My latest none thinking response was with the current Mrs T (whom is on a diet and was complaining about the food items I had purchased for consumption by myself and our two children....
Current Mrs T - "You aren't supporting me in my efforts to lose weight buying what I like"
Me - "perhaps if you applied as much effort to your diet as you do to not having sex, you would lose weight in no time"

This was not the best reply and it's currently "picture with no sound" for me at home.