Things not to say to the wife

Don looks great

 

I’ll order a barrel of Newton and Ridley for the norverners

 

Don’ll be drinking Babycham.

 

Don’t. You’ve got me filling up already.

 

Me too. I’m welling up

 

Should we bring confetti or observe Aussie wedding protocol and throw horse manure instead?

 

How about the stag weekend, I was thinking Barnsley

 

Sounds good, but I’ll be bringing my own beer.

 

Ftfy...



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I was thinking the same Snotts

 

If we’re going to tie Don naked to a lamp post, don’t forget to bring the duct tape.

 

Chuffin great gertcha

 

JK might do us a discount ,we can get some oil as well ,when we can decide on what type

 

I've got this picture in my mind of the wedding reception will be like something out of Crocodile Dundee

 

I hope they don’t have bagpipes, god I hate the sound of bagpipes, they sound like a cat that’s caught it’s balls on a barbed wire fence

 

Got my beer in the sideboard 'ere...

 

If you are attending, remember to get well lagered-up for the fight in the car park at midnight

 

Whippet V kangaroo racing at reception.I'll bring the ferret roulette kit too.

 

Will be getting a pre-emptive skirmish in well early. It's tradition!

 

This wedding organising is hard work,
How about a weekend at the next Techenders as a wedding present