Your biggest achievement to date...

I wired a light in my house that turns on and off
Last time I did it it stayed on for five years only going off when the bulb went

 

I have to admit to performance enhancing sprouts and beans

 

These aren't real are they?

 

I suspected as much....I shall be contacting the Olympic Committee and seek to have your gold medals rescinded promptly.

And just so you know....you ruined this boy's dream

Say it ain't so Joe....

 

OMG - is it an Olympic sport - I could have been a contender

 

JITAF was one of the original Greek sports....Warriors were often tested in the manner...in fact much art has been inspired by JITAF...Greek urns, Mosaics...in fact Munch's The Scream painting depics an unsuccessful protagonists attempt the the hybrid JITAFANSY competition.

ANSY means 'and not.......yourself', as demonstrated in their noble coat of arms...

 

I blame the drink

 

managed a 30 second fart once.

Designed a circuit block for Philips which ended up being used in tens of millions of CD players in the 1990s.

 

I made a hook with no moving parts for hanging lamps on any tent pole at any height out of a tent peg *

*Patent pending - I'm gonna be rich I tell yers!