Daily diary of a BMW driver

(pinched of another forum)

The other day I was cruising along as usual coming onto one of my motorways, which was very busy with inferior cars.<br /> <br />First off, I couldn't believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip road! I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway!<br /> <br />The driver of the car behind me did realise his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn.<br /> <br />Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get to the BMW lane.<br /> <br />Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 110 mph enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me, I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane of my motorway, but was driving at a ridiculous 70 mph!<br /> <br />Naturally, I got within a foot or so of his rear bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way.<br /> <br />Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back out behind me!<br /> <br />He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I would out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get onto the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car.<br /> <br />Needless to say, I was eager to oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper confirming what I already knew - that my car goes fast!<br /> <br />Apparently he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to take my drivers licence to a police station to be sent away to have some points put on! (They're not free points either - they're £20 each and I was only allowed 3.) But the man at the police station said that because I drive a BMW, it won't be much longer before I earn the full 12 points, and then I won't even NEED a driving licence, so they will take it off me!

 

very good! I'll send it to my misses, she drives a beamer

 

That would be appropriate for Audi A3/A4 driver especially the TD ones.

 

I went in a BMW the other day and was shocked to find that the indicator switch is not in the glove box as i had thought but is within reach of the steering wheel

 

haha love this!!

 

What's the difference between a BMW and a hedgehog?

 

The hedgehog's got pricks on the outside.

 

BMW's for all their sins committed against me in my bus or in my car, I take sweet revenge when I am on my bike. >

Hateful vehicles. I would not own one out of principle. Even though they are probably v good cars.

 

One helped to write me off 2years ago, i wont put what BMW stands for but you can if you want :

 

You're probably right BS. But I couldnt care less about cars really so I opt for a boring old Saab. No car can excite me like a motorbike can.

Now the bus was a revelation. Its so slow and makes me smile and sometimes i just laugh out loud driving him.

 

I always hated BMW until 3 years ago when I wanted to change my megane that was always knackered and drove one. I've had my 320 coupe diesel for 3 years now and it's great. I know that they have a bad name amongst other drivers but I promise if you drive one with a completely unbiased frame of mind you will like me realise how good a car they are and change your mind about them. Mine is 8 years old now and has 120k on the clock and feels great, apart from when it snows. You may as well try and reach your destination in a bath tub.

 

... sorry, I don't understand this "everyone who drives a XXX car is a @hailfrank ban me please" thing. It's not true.

Grow up. We've all been young, we've all been idiots, and we'll all be old. That covers the spectrum of bad driving and it has nothing to do with makes of cars.

Stu

 

When I was taking driving lessons my instructor specifically told me to "steer clear of all BMW's as they are only driven by nobs. " lol

 

Now I always thought BMW's were nice cars until my dad bought one after I insisted he bought an Audi. Lovely on the outside wonderful drive but the interior looked so plastic and thrown together, the sort of thing you expect in a ford. To me that killed it, why build a great looking car that drives and handles well then slap a universal interior in?

Needless to say he only had it a little while and traded it in for an Audi and he agrees that the Audi is better.