Elvis Presley climbed out of his swimming pool for the 10th time in a row. His wife said "Why do you keep doing that?". He replied "I can't help falling in, love."
Yes, I wasnt even scraping the bottom of the barrel. I had obliterated the barrel and urinated on its memory. I will try harder next time. Possibly....
Here are some examples of Scouse graffitti / toilet wall humour - aimed at your mother ( yer ma) and your father (yer da) "Ye da does keepy ups with a lettuce, an calls himself Mo Salad." "Ya da does 5 yard sprints in sports direct, trying on new trainers." "Ye da claps when the plane lands." "Yer ma eats pilchards out the tin and reads the auto trader on the bog." "Ye ma kicks the fruity in 'Spoons." "Ye ma has her own bar stool." "Ye ma's only got bookies pens in her gaff." "Ye da sits at the top of the stairs and pretends he's the Chaser." "Ye da does the hoovering in boxing gloves and calls himself dyson fury." "Ya da eating pringles with a knife and fork." "Ya ma think Ringo is the best Beatle." "Ye ma fights on the step." "Yer da eats cold mushy peas out the tin." "Ya da buys 50ps off gumtree." "All ya ma’s passwords are password."
My son asked me where Pooh comes from. After a while and giving it a little thought as to how I could word it I settled down and explained to him the workings of a human stomach. Content I had done a good parental job I asked him if he was happy enough with my explanation. He looked at me a little confused and asked “So what about Tigger and Piglet?”