Yer dad!

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Poptop2, Nov 25, 2015.

  1. Poptop2

    Poptop2 Administrator

    It was complicated. I was with my nan and grandad until I was 7 and it was a nice upbringing. My nan was getting older and I went home in the week after I turned 7. Home was manic. The two worlds could not have been more different. The home Nan and grandad ran was quiet and orderly,slightly religious as Nan did lots for the church and mothers union,but peaceful.

    Home was busy and the drink fuelled arguments and odd family parties that ended in fights where there was no order. was too much for me at times. When grandad died I had no one to talk to or fall back on for reassurance. He had done so much to educate me in nice ways. I needed assurance I was still doing the right thing after he died,but he wasn't there. It's a big thing to a twelve year old.

    When my uncle died a couple of years back his wife gave me a plastic bag with a scarf in it. I opened the bag when I got home and smelled it. It was my grandad's scarf and I could smell him on it. Bloody hell he died in 1970 and it was as if he were there with me in my bedroom. Tears just rolled down my cheeks. I couldn't help it.

    Funny old life innit.
     
    Last edited: Nov 27, 2015
  2. My OH was brought up by her grandparents from the age of 15, as well as her sisters who were much younger.
    Her mum died of cancer real quick, she passed the day before her exams. Her dad had done one when she was a baby so never knew him, still doesn't. Her step-dad was a drinker, aggressive man and a real ar%ehole. One of the worst types, you know.
    Wouldn't let her mum come home from hospital to die because he had another women round most days. OH and sisters could have seen her mum for a last time if the mum could come home. At 15 the trip was too far after school to the hospital you see.

    Step-dad became non-existent and grandparents became new parents. Strange though, as she married an ar%ehole just like her step-dad! He left for another women and whiskey.

    Then she met me. Poor cow haha


    Anyway, much love to the lot of you and think positive ok. Big world out there and your name is written all over it :beer::hug::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup:
     
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  3. Poptop2

    Poptop2 Administrator

    Some really honest and open replies on this thread. It's amazing how a rambling first post has opened up a lot of people to talk about their past and family life. I am sure a lot have read it and thought about writing their story but thought better of it. I think that is understandable given its a open forum.

    In the end your past is your past and there isn't much. You can do about it now. We are the people we are because of our past and upbringing whatever that may be.

    For me personally I probably had to go through what I went through at some stage of my life. I am just glad I had good parents and family to help me through it. I can't help but feel really sad for those whose parents/dads were not there for them or too wrapped up in their own world to see the damage they did.

    We should never judge a person really,but if we do we should judge then on what they are now,not their past. Imo.

    Carry on with the good work Tlb you're the Carlsberg forum.
     
    Last edited: Nov 28, 2015
    salad.dodger2 likes this.
  4. Fosters is better
     
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  5. My dad died at the age of 41, when I was 19. I learned a lot from him and still think of things he taught me in every day life. He was responsible for the VW interactions of my youth and for my love of the type 2. I remember being about 13 and helping him (in my own way) whilst he was fixing his van. I wish he was still around to help me fix mine! I still use many of his tools - surprisingly, and each time I do I feel a bit of a connection still.
     
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  6. I too used to 'help' my dad working on cars (I don't recall him helping me when I was older though) and in my almost teenage/early teens I used to go out to work with him when he was a milk man. That put me right off doing it for a living I can tell you. :rolleyes: He now lives on one of the worst ever estates to be a milkman on, no roads, all footpaths. Anyway, if I need to remenisce I can still visit him :confused: or go to youtube and listen to him trying to be a rock star. o_O
     
  7. Sounds like a right nice bloke, at least your mum know it wasn't you taking from her purse, feel for your poor old mum too!
     
  8. My Dad died when I was 6, he had been a PoW in Poland from 41-45 and was on the death march at the end of the war - it took its toll on him and I never got to know him (I only found out about his history when my Mum died a few years ago) he went to work early and I was in bed when he came back.

    To me, at the time I felt he had left us and I can't say I thought any more about him until I had my kids - I was fixated on doing everything for them because I thought my Dad didn't for me and I had a pretty bad time of it mentally for a few years. As my kids have got older and I began to see things a little clearer, I realise that he was work all the hours of the day to provide for us and in fact was doing all he could to support us as a family.

    I wish I could have talked to him about what he went through, in fact I just wish I could have talked to him............
     
  9. I have a family relative who was a ww2 pow in Poland at the Stalag XXA camp. He was captured near Dunkirk and spent the entire war as a prisoner in the Thorn area mainly as a farm labourer. The camp was evacuated in January 1945 in a bitterly cold winter as the Russians were getting near and he was on the Long March and eventually liberated by the Americans near Brunswick.

    His long ordeal left him physically and mentally scarred as you would expect and although he went on to marry and have a family, it was obvious he was still suffering. He was difficult to get to know and he could not let go of his hatred for the Germans.

    There is a book published called The Long March and well worth reading. Stalag XXA still survives as the old castle and train station prisoner reception buildings at Thorn (Torun), it seems now to be a tourist attaction. There is some film of it on YouTube and it is bloody grim.

    I think the problem when growing up is its easy to judge family without really understanding the feelings they are bottling up.

    I did some research and obtained details of his pow record and where he was held. The Germans (and British) kept accurate records from what I could tell. I found maps and accounts of the Long March and even the post war trial of the XXA commandant and his execution for war crimes.

    I do a lot of family history and it does put you there and help to fill in the gaps about loved ones who didnt want to talk about it.

    Give it a try.
     
    paul2590, snotty and Poptop2 like this.
  10. Cheers @mgbman, will search out that book. My father was also captured at Dunkirk (he was in the Worcester's) and was in Stalag VIIIB which was associated with a coal mine - according to the little I have found on the internet - it feels like time to find out more!
     
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  11. Poptop2

    Poptop2 Administrator

    I know a lot of the Worcester's records were destroyed in the Norton barracks fire Bry. There are a couple of places on line that you can gleam some stuff. I have tried researching my grandads service records from the 1stww to not much avail.

    http://www.worcestershireregiment.com/
     
  12. The book is called Survivor of the Long March by Charles Waite get it from amazon.co.uk it doesnt cost much but it is a very good read.
     
  13. Should be lots of info about Stalag VIIIB. I found sites where relatives post up old prisoner photos and accounts, they mention names as well. You can research the events leading up to capture as you know the regiment. The regiment and family name is a good start to find the actual prisoner record, but you also already know it was Stalag VIIIB but the record should show the date.

    My relative was in the Royal Artillery and when captured I found they were force marched to Germany and taken by train in cattle trucks to Poland. I hope you will enjoy the search experience as I have as what you will discover will put you there.

    I have always been interested in geography so I got a big map of western europe so you can see the journey to Poland and the Long March as well.

    A while back I saw an Australian made film on tv about the long march, it was fantastic and contained a lot of archive film and at the end where the survivors were walking down a lane in Germany and suddenly round the corner came the Americans and liberated them.
     
  14. PS. I have just typed Stalag VIIIB in Google. Loads there for you. Good luck.
     
  15. Found mention of Stalag VIIIB at Lamsdorf and Teschen, Teschen prisoners seemed to be allocated to the coal mines at Niwka .
     
  16. Stalag VIIIB looks complicated as it was a very big camp. There were many coal mines, not just Niwka.

    Google search Lamsdorf or Lamsdorf Death March they will turn up lots for you.

    You will also find the Lamsdorf Museum which has website and can be visited.
     
  17. Thanks all - will start my search today!
     

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