I say fluent French, yet thinking back I probably said " you are baggage and a present for my wife, who is a prostitute and has no scruples. I would like to take one off Father Christmas how would you like to join me so you can be disappointed too. Look at my children's faces, wouldn't you like to smack them are your children yours either...., It all made perfect sense to me, and the words flowed!
The park itself was fab, it being Christmas and there was snow which had caused the airport congestion, our hotel was the superb non Disney dreamcastle hotel and the foyer was decorated like a wonderland, they couldn't have done more for is tbh. The downside was the luggage never turned up until two days after we got home, granted it was completely in tact, but it had all the presents in. Lou n Wills medication and obviously warm clothing. All of which I had to provide by taking numerous taxis from E D to Paris to find Drs and pharmacists. The presents were bought from the hotel lobby and the warm clothing from Disney shops. That holiday cost me £4000 + 900 euros and I got £400 maximum compo from the travel insurance! We did enjoy the park though!
Spending 4 hours in a PVC spray suit during the hottest part of the day is a great aid to weight and consousness loss.
There used to be a publisher that specialized in the more "racy" style of memoir, can't recall it for the moment, daresay @snotty is already aware...