Shamelessly stolen from The Times... This week it is the 30th anniversary of the world wide web, which was proposed by Tim Berners-Lee on March 12, 1989, and as part of the celebrations the first national LBI (Life Before Internet) museum is also opening. Situated at a destination that, as luck always had it, would have turned out to be right on the fold in the A-Z, and therefore impossible to find, it features historical and anthropological exhibits as well as a room dedicated to watching how your football team might be faring on Ceefax. “Incredible,” said one young visitor. “I had no idea. It really makes you appreciate the older generation and what they went through. I kicked off when my parents said we were coming here today, but I’m excited to check out Oracle now.” The days when you had to take two buses to the library just to look something up may well be gone, but the LBI museum will ensure they are never forgotten. “From waiting a week for your photographs to come back to taping songs off the radio, we have it all,” said one curator, who added that it is hoped that those who had experienced life pre-internet would be “for ever remembered as an important part of British history” rather than just dumb old schmucks who aren’t worth the bother. “We want to remind everyone,” continued the curator, “that these are the very people who hiked several miles though rain and ice and hail and snow to the nearest porno store just to look at a dirty picture, so, you know, respect.” For older visitors the museum has proved thrillingly nostalgic. “I spent all this morning,” said one, “sitting in the museum’s interactive travel agency exhibit with a faded curling poster of Cyprus on the wall while the travel agent went through massive books of plane timetables before issuing me with a sheaf of impenetrably complicated paper documents interleaved with several sheets of carbon paper, all handwritten by the agent himself, and which I don’t understand at all. That took me back!” And, as another said, “I particularly recommend the hands-on landline display where you can unravel the kinks in the spirally cord then watch it instantly kink up again as soon as you let go. I don’t think anyone could say we didn’t know how to make our own fun back then.” As for the younger visitors, they have generally been amazed, not just by Ceefax — “I wouldn’t have believed it unless I’d seen it myself and had sat there for 90 minutes just looking at type while waiting for Oxford United to score” — but also the permanent displays showing how dating once worked in real places in real time, how celebrities got fat then skinny again then fat again without anyone knowing, how to stare at the wall hoping time would pass on a Sunday and how “side-boob” was nobody’s business but one’s own. “It’s astonishing to think that these people walked along the same streets as we do today,” said one young visitor, “and I’ve enjoyed learning how they lived, what their customs were, and how they made consumer choices at a time when ‘free shipping’ didn’t come into play. I can now see that there was a lot more to life before the internet than just dirty old fellas trudging through snow.” However, other young visitors were incredulous. “You’re saying some people actually lived like this,” said one, “and didn’t just click on stuff all day? Come on. I’m not that stupid. Gimme a break.” If you wish to judge for yourself, the LBI museum is open from 10am to 6pm daily, unless it’s closed for some reason, in which case you won’t know until you get there. (As for rolls of film left to be developed, leave it ten working days before returning to pick up the photographs rather than a week. Just to be safe.)
Good god man, you'll be telling me next you have boiled egg and soldiers for breakfast before donning your bowler, tucking your umbrella under your arm, getting a peck from the Mrs on the doorstep before taking the number 9 bus to the office.
I do dip into the Guardian from time to time, but that's just for a laugh. Can't really appreciate it, as I'm not a vegan lesbian of colour.
Well, there goes my theory on how you look and where you live. Do you want to quash any more of my misconceptions. I don't suppose you wear sandals and picnic in Highgate cemetery reading extracts of Das kapital either?
It's fine and dandy to remember the good stuff but I'm all for the future. I want to know where were headed and how we can make it a better place for the next generation.
The next generation seem to be generally selfish, ungrateful and self-important. I don't think they will appreciate or value anything, so I think it best we just enjoy the ride ourselves. ***stokes log-burner, revs smokey 2-stroke scooter***
Maybe the majority of experiences with younger people Maybe the majority of experiences with younger people gives off that impression, or are we just turning into our dad's? I know and have met some cracking youngsters that give me hope in the future of humanity. Seriously impressed when it comes to their intelligence & possitive attitudes We are all products of our enviroment so it's not their fault raised by parents with no parenting skills, surrounded by must have's, latest everything or your a nobody, judgemental social media, Low oppertunities in jobs and education, no chance of owning their own homes, can't afford to drive, live with mum and dad till 38, virtual reality worlds better than their own, no structure, no rules, brexit!!!, nothing to look forward too and no friends (facebook freinds and followers are not real friends............)
Pretty much what the old uns used to say about us . My mum in law showed me a quote yesterday saying something almost identical....... from about 800 years ago
Taps. You used to have two, one hot, one cold. Rotate the top for gradually more water, rotate the opposite way for gradually less water. These days it's a mixture of the krypton factor and vogueing to get the things to work. The Victorians were to busy building brilliant things to 'optimise' taps. Just saying.
I Im proud of my 16 year old son. He has a job 3 days of the week on £8.00 an hour, he’s on a plumbing course for 3 days a week and he has 1 day off.